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GenART Telechat review of draft-ietf-ecrit-location-hiding-req-02

2010-02-16 15:35:07
[Oops, resending with the updated address for Laura Liess. Sorry for the repeat]

I have been selected as the General Area Review Team (Gen-ART)
reviewer for this draft (for background on Gen-ART, please see
http://www.alvestrand.no/ietf/gen/art/gen-art-FAQ.html).

Please wait for direction from your document shepherd
or AD before posting a new version of the draft.

Document: draft-ietf-ecrit-location-hiding-req-02
Reviewer: Ben Campbell
Review Date: 16 Feb 2010
IESG Telechat date: 18 Feb 2010

Summary: This draft is really close to ready for publication as an 
informational RFC. I have one unaddressed editorial comment, which on 
reflection I am promoting to a minor issue, as well as a few more editorial 
comments that should probably not block publication.

Major issues:
Minor issues:

-- section 3.3, first bullet:

I'm still a little confused by seeing a normative MUST in a section entitled 
"Desirable Properties". If it's really a MUST, then perhaps it should be 
promoted to a bona-fide requirement? Otherwise, perhaps it should be a SHOULD?

Nits/editorial comments:

-- Req-10:  The solution MUST allow the end host to determine PSAP/ESRP URLs 
prior to the call, for all emergency services.

Who is the "end host"?

-- section 3.3, third bullet:

s/"...break by the presence..."/"...break in the presence..."    [or "...be 
broken by the presence..."]


-- idnits has some new things to say. (I suspect the boilerplate complaints 
have to do with the paragraphs splitting across page breaks.)

tmp/draft-ietf-ecrit-location-hiding-req-02.txt:

 Checking boilerplate required by RFC 5378 and the IETF Trust (see
 http://trustee.ietf.org/license-info):
 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------

 ** The document seems to lack a License Notice according IETF Trust
    Provisions of 28 Dec 2009, Section 6.b.i or Provisions of 12 Sep 2009
    Section 6.b -- however, there's a paragraph with a matching beginning.
    Boilerplate error?

    (You're using the IETF Trust Provisions' Section 6.b License Notice from
    12 Feb 2009 rather than one of the newer Notices.  See
    http://trustee.ietf.org/license-info/.)


 Checking nits according to http://www.ietf.org/ietf/1id-guidelines.txt:
 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------

    No issues found here.

 Checking nits according to http://www.ietf.org/ID-Checklist.html:
 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------

    No issues found here.

 Miscellaneous warnings:
 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------

 == The copyright year in the IETF Trust and authors Copyright Line does not
    match the current year

 == The document seems to lack the recommended RFC 2119 boilerplate, even if
    it appears to use RFC 2119 keywords -- however, there's a paragraph with
    a matching beginning. Boilerplate error?

    (The document does seem to have the reference to RFC 2119 which the
    ID-Checklist requires).
 == The document seems to lack a disclaimer for pre-RFC5378 work, but was
    first submitted before 10 November 2008.  Should you add the disclaimer?
    (See the Legal Provisions document at
    http://trustee.ietf.org/license-info for more information.). 


 Checking references for intended status: Informational
 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------

 == Outdated reference: A later version (-10) exists of
    draft-ietf-geopriv-l7-lcp-ps-09

 == Outdated reference: A later version (-10) exists of
    draft-ietf-ecrit-framework-09

 == Outdated reference: A later version (-09) exists of
    draft-ietf-geopriv-lbyr-requirements-07

 == Outdated reference: A later version (-16) exists of
    draft-ietf-geopriv-http-location-delivery-15


    Summary: 1 error (**), 7 warnings (==), 0 comments (--).

    Run idnits with the --verbose option for more detailed information about
    the items above.





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