Many thanks for your detailed review, Russ!
Yuanlong, will there be a new draft version or other edits before the draft
is approved?
Jari
On 17 Nov 2015, at 00:53, Jiangyuanlong <jiangyuanlong(_at_)huawei(_dot_)com>
wrote:
Russ,
Thanks a lot for your review and good observations.
Please see my comments in line.
Best regards,
Yuanlong
-----Original Message-----
From: Russ Housley [mailto:housley(_at_)vigilsec(_dot_)com]
Sent: Saturday, November 14, 2015 1:28 AM
To: draft-ietf-l2vpn-vpls-pe-etree(_dot_)all(_at_)ietf(_dot_)org
Cc: IETF Gen-ART; IETF
Subject: Gen-ART Review of draft-ietf-l2vpn-vpls-pe-etree-10
I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area Review
Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed by the IESG for
the IETF Chair. Please wait for direction from your document shepherd or AD
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For more information, please see the FAQ at
<http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>.
Document: draft-ietf-l2vpn-vpls-pe-etree-10
Reviewer: Russ Housley
Review Date: 2015-11-13
IETF LC End Date: 2015-11-24
IESG Telechat date: unknown
Summary: Almost Ready
Major Concerns: None
Minor Concerns:
Sections 4.1 and 5.3.1 inclues a reference to [802.1Q-2011]. Should this be
the 2014 version of the document? If not, please add the informative
reference for [802.1Q-2011].
[YJ] Yes, all these should refer to [802.1Q-2014].
Other Editorial Comments:
The Abstract should appear on the title page.
[YJ] OK.
Section 3 needs a reference for MEF 6.1:
s/Specification MEF 6.1/Specification MEF 6.1 [MEF6.1]/ Also, [MEF6.1]
needs to be added as a normative reference.
[YJ] All these will be updated to MEF 6.2.
Section 3 needs a reference for IEEE 802.1Q-2003:
s/B.1.3 of IEEE 802.1Q-2003/B.1.3 of IEEE 802.1Q-2003 [802.1Q-2003]/ Also,
please add an informative reference for [802.1Q-2003].
[YJ] Yes, we will add an informative reference for [802.1Q-2003].
Third level section headings do not have space between the section number
and the section title. For example:
s/5.3.1.PW Processing/5.3.1. PW Processing/
[YJ] OK.
In Fig 4, there is room to shift the figure to the right, this will allow
the "AC"
labels to fit better on the left:
+----------------------------------------+
| VPLS-capable PE model |
| +---------------+ +------+ |
| | |==========|TVSI-1|------------
+---+ AC | | ------------ |------------ PWs
|CE |----------| Bridge ------------ |------------
+---+ | | | Root & +------+ |
| | Module | Leaf VLAN o |
| | | o |
| | | o |
| | | o |
| | | o |
+---+ AC | | | VLAN-n +------+ |
|CE |----------| ------------VSI-n |-------------
+---+ | | |==========| |------------- PWs
| | | ^ | |-------------
| +---------------+ | +------+ |
| | |
+-------------------------|--------------+
LAN emulation Interface
Figure 4 A VPLS PE Model for E-Tree with a Single T-VSI
[YJ] OK.
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