On Sun, 20 Apr 2003 22:07:27 -0600
John Fenley <pontifier(_at_)hotmail(_dot_)com> wrote:
From: J C Lawrence
Just to consolidate:
I wish you wouldn't. It ruins In-Reply-To/References threading.
Roughly 60% of the mail I write is to people I don't know, and for
which I don't care (quite literally, zero interest and in a few
cases, negative interest) if those particular people actually receive
the message.
I'm wondering why you would write to them in the first place.
There are several reasons, mostly typically that I'm interested in
participating in the list/forum/community and thus other incidental
audiences for the message rather than that recipient in particular.
What is missing is any specific value or caring on my part for that
especial< recipient. I rarely give a rats whether any given individual
receives a courtesy copy of one of my list posts (tho I do care that I
at least send it as a courtesy).
This post to this list is a decent example. I am replying to your post.
A courtesy copy is directed to you. You may receive the courtesy copy,
you may not. You may read the courtesy copy, you may not. Little
matter. My primary interest is that the message reaches
asrg(_at_)ietf(_dot_)org,
and is broadcast and archived. The rest is happenstance and protocol.
Now if your system wants to challenge the list broadcast... That's
between you and the list owner. My standard response as a list owner
would be to null route your domain after the third challenge. No more
challenge. No more problem.
The message obviously isn't that important to you, and if it is
important to them it is quite rude to let your dislike of C/R stand in
the way of delivery.
It might be important to them, it might not. If it is, its up to them,
not me, to ensure that they receive and read those important messages.
After all, that is their importance assignment, not mine. My assignment
of importance on my message for that recipient in particular is quite
low. They are free to differ, and on that basis, are free to build a
system which demonstrates that difference in value assignments, be it
positive or negative.
Quite literally, in the general case its none of my business or interest
whichever way their inclinations run.
The problem isn't what the challenge is, it is that there _is_ a
challenge, that there is a bar to be crossed, that in some way I must
do something extra to win your ear, your screen, your attention.
Have you ever scheduled an apointment with someone?
Sure. Have you?
That is a bar to be crossed, you can't just barge in and demand to
speak with someone.
Ignoring the needless pejorative, "demand", certainly, but I can
metaphorically barge in by emailing them right now, this very second,
and requesting they call me at their leisure. If email is not
available, a post-it note dropped on their desk for their convenient
attention is equally effective.
It's rude.
Email is a wonderful system that way -- it doesn't require immediate
reading _OR_ response, or in fact any attention at all.
The reality is, C/R systems are all around us.
They can be. There needn't be. As happens, in my life there are
relatively few of them, and they grow fewer by the day. Please don't
assume that everyone else is as parochial as you. It unnecessarily
demeans you.
They show that you are a courteous person to respect others wishes,
and time.
Oddly enough, it is precisely that which C/R email systems generally
demonstrate the reverse of to me. C/R systems on personal email systems
effectively demonstrates to me that the person behind the C/R address
has little to no respect for my time, attention, or wishes, and in fact
considers themselves to be so extremely compelling and spectacular that
I must of course be ready and willing to perform tricks just for the
glorious honour of being allowed to get a communication in their
presence.
Now precisely why did I want to send this priggish boor an email again?
Precisely why did I want to willingly subject myself to that abuse? Am
I really that hungry for humiliation? Do I need to be told that I and
my time is worthless?
No thanks. I've better things to do with my time, and better people to
spend it on.
I will respond to C/R systems on personal email addresses when I have a
personal driving interest, a consuming investment, which validates and
justifies the expense. Examples might be a question or petition I send
to an expert or authority. So far that has happened once. In fact, the
only time it has happened has been for a role address.
Surprising that.
--
J C Lawrence
---------(*) Satan, oscillate my metallic sonatas.
claw(_at_)kanga(_dot_)nu He lived as a devil, eh?
http://www.kanga.nu/~claw/ Evil is a name of a foeman, as I live.
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