Hi,
I mostly ready this from the perspective of the IRTF, since this is intended
to also apply to us. I found that that wasn't terribly clear from the current
text.
Lars
Section 1., paragraph 0:
1. Definitions
Sorting these definitions alphabetically is not really helpful to the
reader. Could you order them such that terms are defined before being
referred to, or at least try?
Section 1., paragraph 3:
b. "Contribution": any submission to the IETF intended by the
Contributor for publication as all or part of an Internet-Draft or
RFC and any statement made within the context of an IETF activity,
in each case that is intended to affect the IETF Standards Process
or that is related to the activity of an Alternate Stream that has
adopted this definition.
What do you mean by "this definition"? Also, it's not clear what
"activity of an Alternate Stream" is supposed to convey. I think this
intends to capture work occurring in IRTF RGs, but it's a pretty
indirect way of stating this.
Section 1., paragraph 4:
Such statements include oral statements, as well as written and
electronic communications, which are addressed to:
The list below does not include IRTF mailing lists or meetings.
Section 1., paragraph 9:
e. "IETF": In the context of this document, the IETF includes all
individuals who participate in meetings, working groups, mailing
lists, functions and other activities which are organized or
initiated by ISOC, the IESG or the IAB under the general
designation of the Internet Engineering Task Force or IETF, but
solely to the extent of such participation.
For clarity, I would also call out the IRTF and its RGs here.
Section 1., paragraph 10:
f. "IETF Documents": RFCs and Internet-Drafts that are published as
part of the IETF Standards Process. These are also referred to as
"IETF Stream Documents" as defined in Section 5.1.1 of RFC 4844.
What about RFCs and Internet-Drafts that are intended as contributions
to IRTF activities? It would be useful to maybe add "...part of the
IETF Standards Process and related activities" to make this clearer.
Section 1., paragraph 11:
g. "IETF Standards Process": the activities undertaken by the IETF in
any of the settings described in the above definition of
Contribution. The IETF Standards Process may include
participation in activities and publication of documents that are
not directed toward the development of IETF standards or
specifications, such as the development and publication of
informational documents.
I'd again explicitly call out the alternate streams here. And maybe
this document is meant for lawyers and I am not one, but having a
definition called "IETF Standards Process" that also includes all of
our non-standard-setting activities is confusing.
Section 1., paragraph 17:
m. "RFC": the basic publication series for the IETF. RFCs are
published by the RFC Editor and once published are never modified.
(See [RFC2026] Section 2.1)
Might want to mention the existence of errata.
Section 5.5., paragraph 0:
5.5. Licensing Information in an IPR Disclosure
It's been running code on the IRTF side to be very OK with not having
license terms included, esp. if it significantly delays the official
filing of the disclosure, since RGs don't set standards and therefore
don't really need to consider licensing terms. Not clear if that
should be discussed here.
Section 11., paragraph 2:
The legal rules that apply to documents in Alternate Streams are
established by the managers of those Alternate Streams as defined in
[RFC 4844]. (i.e., the Internet Architecture Board (IAB), Internet
Research Steering Group (IRSG) and Independent Submission Editor).
Is the IRSG really the manager of the IRTF stream? I thought it was
the IRTF chair, but I can't find the definitive answer in either 4844,
5742 or 5743...