I have to say one of the things I have found positive about this mailing
list is the lack of ad hominem flamewars. Unfortunately this is an
exception.
It doesn't matter who starts these things. It always takes two to tango.
If somebody makes an attack on you directly, rather than addressing your
arguments with facts and reason, do what I do -- don't reply.
We're seasoned folks here. When we see a post sink down to personal insults,
trust me, we think less of the insulter than of the insulted. At least until
the insulted joins the fray. I know it's hard not to reply some times
but it works _amazingly_ well. If you really feel the need to vent, send
a private email reply and be done with it. But frankly, when I have given
into the temptation to do that, I have rarely gotten satisfaction.
If you find yourself ever referring to another member of the group by name
person because you want to talk about them rather than refer to their arguments,
just walk away. It really works, and no, people don't think you're a wimp
for not responding to the bald faced accusations. I at least will think
you are strong.
Don't answer the ad-hominem attack even with reason, and definitely not in
anger. About the only working exception I have seen to this is if you can
answer it with comedy to defuse the situation. But comedy is a serious
business, best left to professionals, so don't try it at home.
On Tue, Mar 25, 2003 at 11:53:41PM -0700, Vernon Schryver wrote:
From: "Hallam-Baker, Phillip" <pbaker(_at_)verisign(_dot_)com>
Vernon keeps repeating the lie that I am knowingly misrepresenting spews
So unless vernon wants to admit he is a part of the spews cabal - which
would explain a lot, particularly his attitude, I don't see the point in
revisiting this point. Yes spews is completely out of control.
Yes, I do not beat my wife.
- SPEWS does not answer anyone outside the SPEWS cabal. Saying that
SPEWS has not denied Phillip Hallam-Baker's claims proves them true
is an amazingly clumsy charade. Even if SPEWS did not have a policy
consistent silence, a refusal to answer Phillip Hallam-Baker's
obvious knowingly false claims would not make those false claims true.
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